Friday, December 18, 2009

Hard to be soft...

this is, currently, my favrit song. It's an accoustic version, which I prefer, but there is an album version out there with a little bit more jump to it if that's what you're into.



Can you believe how close we are to christmas?! Holy hell! Merry Christmas, anyways.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Any Way The Wind Blows...

I HAVEN'T BLOGGED IN AGES!!!

Sunday, November 1, 2009

paint by numbers of the beast

Paint by Numbers of the Beast: Possibly the cleverest thing I ever came up with.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

I was bored again.

I'm not sure if it's funny, but I found these screencaps of Commander Riker, and I knew something had to be done with them.

Riker is a dick

Friday, October 23, 2009

Vaca

Finally got some pictures from my vacation up.

Here's me with a giant Pysanka.
009

Here's me with a giant sausage.
179

Here's me in a lake.
016

Exciting, no?! No.

Anyways, if you want to see more pictures, go here. It's not that special, mainly pictures of family and stuff. I also took a buttload of cemetery pictures. So if that's your thing, go here to see them (as well as some of my older cemetery stuff).

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Ooh, that's dirty!

You. Must. Watch. This.

Not for kids. Or parents. Maybe not a good idea if you're at work either.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Ramming Stone

I've been on a bit of a Rammstein kick lately, and it's been a while since I blogged, so I figured I'd share some of my favourite songs/videos, since I've got nothing else interesting going on. These 3 songs, I think, really show Rammstein's range and power.

Rosenrot, from the album Rosenrot.


Mein Teil,from the album Reise, Reise. Something a little harder.


Lastly, Ohne Dich, also from the album Reise, Reise. The lyrics of this song (which itself translates as 'Without you') are really quite sad. Take the first verse...

Ich werde in die Tannen gehen
Dahin wo ich sie zuletzt gesehen
Doch der Abend wirft ein Tuch aufs Land
und auf die Wege hinterm Waldesrand
Und der Wald er steht so schwarz und leer
Weh mir, oh weh
Und die Vögel singen nicht mehr

Translated...

I'm going to go into the fir trees
There where I last saw her
But the evening is throwing a cloth upon the land
and upon the ways behind the edge of the forest
And the forest it is so black and empty
Woe is me, oh woe
And the birds sing no more

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Back.

and look what I made.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Quitting time.

131 Canadian soldiers have now been killed in Afghanistan. Originally I had planned a long, ranting blog post about this, filled with profanity and a few slurs for good measure. I actually had most of it written out before I decided to scrap it. All I want to say, really, is that it's time for Canada to get out of Afghanistan. I know this seems really mild, and not much of an argument, but I'm sure my friends know how I really feel.

Anyways, I'm going on vacation. The missus and the dog and I are headed off to Saskatchewan to take it easy for a week. I'll have lots of pictures and hopefully a good story or two when I get back.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Bang!

I downloaded the new version of iTunes, and it came with Safari. So I tried it out. Safari sucks. F*ck you, Apple.

Anyways.

Random Thought Of People Our Age. So true. So awesome.

Hm. I'm sure I had more but seem to have forgotten it. I think I'm getting old. For instance, I stopped drinking at 6am and was still hungover at midnight. Thing is, I barely drank anything. The only good thing is it was alcohol I'd mooched off of other people.

Yawn.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Die Walkure

Haven't done a movie review in a while. How about now?

Valkyrie (2008)
I really really enjoyed this film. Even though it got a little slow at a few points, and I totally knew what was going to happen, it actually was quite suspenseful. That being said I don't think I really need to get into the plot, seeing as how it's historical. But the plot was good. I thought the acting was excellent, even though some of the Germans had English accents and some didn't, which was more funny than distracting. There was a surprising amount of talent in the cast that I wasn't aware of before I watched the movie (Kenneth Branagh, Bill Nighy, Eddy Izzard, Terence Stamp, the list goes on). Even Tom Cruise was tolerable. I find I can watch his movies as long as I don't think about him being Tom Cruise in real life. Anyways, movie was good, watch it if you haven't already, tell me what you think.
My Rating - 4 out of 5.

P.S. Do you think that guy who played Major Remer is tired of playing Nazis yet? (Look him up, you'll figure it out.)

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Blog from right now.

This has been my life lately. I'm like 450 pages in. Other than that I've been trying to hang shelves with little success. And watching TV, since we got cable. Right now I'm watching Pulp Fiction. That is all.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Tragically Un-hip

Crystal and I went to see The Tragically Hip on August 5th. Howsabout you lookit some pitchers?

005copy008copy019copy021copy
This is Kathleen Edwards, who opened for the Hip. The fellow in blue is Jim Bryson, who played keyboard for the Hip later in the night.

022copy027copy030copy034copy044copy055copy061copy

115copy099copyAs you can see, most of these photos are of Gord. Actually the only one I wasn't able to get a decent photo of was the bass player, AKA the Other Gord. Hah.

048copyThis was my favourite photo that I took all night (Crystal took some of these). Too bad his strumming hand is blurry. Oh well.

Anyways, the concert was really good, possibly even one of the best I've ever been to (except for the usual concert-going assholes). They played pretty much every song I had hoped they would (including Bobcaygeon, my favourite). It really was a perfect night for an outdoor concert.

Funny Story: All night, Gord was wiping his face with these little white towels and then tossing them to the audience. They played Little Bones (Crystal's favourite tune by them) for the encore, and just as they were finally leaving the stage he tossed his last white towel and it miraculously landed right in Crystal's hand. Really just an excellent concert experience.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Braaaaainz


Boredom + Severe dislike of Chad Kroeger = This abomination. I got bored before I could do a background. I also realize it's odd for a demon zombie to have perfect salon hair.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

The Jokah

Guess what I finally learned how to do?

Friday, July 24, 2009

iBlogd

A new comic I've been reading. It's 18+, and I could probably do without the talking cactus, but its all fun.

Girls With Slingshots: Because I'll read anything Jeph Jacques tells me to!

I bought an iPod today. I feel... sullied.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

First Woman Reclining?

Another fun game for y'all to play:

Red Remover

That's all for now. I know it's nothing exciting, but I feel I haven't been blogging enough lately, so I figured I'd better give you something. For now I'm gonna go watch Last Man Standing, which is very underrated in my opinion.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Flash Blog

I'm in a hurry, as I'm off to see the new Harry Potter tonight. So play these games.

Monkey Kick Off - My top score was 4678.
Crush The Castle - The best part is making your own castles.

Also, don't forget that I'm making comics again. Please make me happy and read them.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Read Free or Die

Well I suppose now is as good a time as any to tell you all I've started making webcomics again. They aren't as detailed as the old ones (if anyone even remembers them) and they're more of a one-panel gag deal, but with time and practice I intend to get better. So if the crappy drawing throws you off, please just bear with me for a while. There are only a few online as of yet, but you can see the new comics here or here. I personally think the first link is a better layout, and the system used to manage the comics is much more user friendly, but maybe eventually I'll get the hang of the second one.

On the topic of comics, here are some I've been reading lately.

Johnny Wander by Yuko Ota & Amranth Panagarlya
Ellerbisms by Marc Ellerby
Thingpart by Joey Alison Sayers
DAR: A Super Girly Top Secret Comic Diary by Erika Moen (this one is 18+ and has a lot of lesbians in it, so don't read if that offends you.)
Pictures For Sad Children by John Campbell

Good stuff!

My dad is getting married in 3 days. It's strange for me because my dad has been single for like a bajillion years. But if he's happy, I'm happy. Also, weddings are always a good excuse to get liquored up.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Kilty

So one of the exciting things that happened during this most recent bout of not-updating-the-blog is that my wife Crystal and I attended the Grande Prairie Highland games on June 14th. We ate meat pies which I'm quite certain were made with lamb (though Crystal denies this). We watched the sheepdog trials (our favourite was a dog named Tank). We watched a few of the games but there was only a handful of athletes so it was kind of unexciting, and only one guy managed to turn the caber. We watched a little bit of the dancing, but that was mainly so I could get photos. It was a good excuse for me to wear my kilt. All in all it was a good time.

Here's a video of the Grande Prairie Pipes and Drums


And you can see some photos here.

And then I got tattoos on the 16th of June. Word of advice: If you're going to get both of your kneecaps tattooed at the same time, make sure you take some time off work.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Vagueries of vagueness

So yeah, I actually have something on the go, just waiting until it gets into full swing before I unveil it to the world, so stay tuned for that.

Also working on something else, so stay tuned for that as well.

Just please don't abandon me.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Flo

Let's start with the sad stuff and then move on to the cool stuff so we can all leave in a good mood.

I feel bad for forgetting to mention in my sad blog post from a few days ago that my wifes cousin was lost in a river last month, and that a 14 year old girl in my hometown was murdered in September. Like I said, a weird, sad year.

Now for the cool.

I'm sure everyone else in the known world has already heard this song, but I never heard of it until my brother sang it at karaoke one night, and then I heard it again today in a CD store. I think it's pretty awesome, and surprisingly deep for how ridiculous the lyrics seem. I am a bit miffed they disallowed embedding, but anyways.

Handlebars - Flobots

Saturday, June 6, 2009

ate bit

Two posts in one day? Madness!

Please enjoy the ridiculously-more-talented-than-I-will-ever-be Hexachordal as he covers The Magnetic Fields tune "All My Little Words" with the help of a Gameboy.



Edit: Forgot to mention i found this via b3ta. Oops.

Complete

I figured yesterday's post was too deep so I better flip it 'round with something funny. I've been playing The Force Unleashed for the past few days, and the Emperor's dialogue made me think of a Family Guy clip from way back.




I probably watched this 20 times yesterday and laughed like a bastard every time.

P.S. The game is fun even if the controls are frustrating and the camera sucks. The story is good and it has pretty decent re-playability. I recommend it.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Strange Days, These Days

Sorry for the gap between updates, been busy lately.

I really don't have much interesting to say, I just wanted to comment on the strangeness of the past year or so. I realized yesterday that the year has been rather (depressingly) weird, when I heard David Carradine had died. As of right now his death is still under investigation, but I personally can't imagine him having taken his own life.
A childhood friend of mine fell from his skateboard on Sunday and died in hospital on Monday, surrounded by his loved ones. My clearest memory of Lance is when he taught me the F-word, and I think I'm still in shock from his sudden passing. Is it wrong of me to think his family was lucky to be there when he went?
Dom DeLuise died on May 4th, one day after my brother commented "You don't hear about Dom DeLuise much these days." (Or something like that). Similarly, I was reading the Wikipedia article about Bea Arthur the day before she died on April 25th.
My uncle Robert died of a heart attack on March 9th at the age of 51, with no real previous indications that he may have been ill. We were all struck by the suddenness of it, I myself being quite shaken. I'm not sure if it was because I lived with him for a few months after graduating or if its because I realize my own father, his brother, is 48 this year. Time does go by.
Going back into 2008, Michael Crichton died of throat cancer in November. You might remember a little story he wrote about a park full of freaking awesome dinosaurs. Or ER, whatever.
Even further back, over a year ago, the tragic death of Heath Ledger, my feelings about which I have already expressed.
So has this year (and more) really been that depressing and tragic? Have other years been the same? Am I just noticing more because I'm getting older, and thinking about my own mortality?
Hmm. Strange days indeed.

Anyways, I promise the next post wont be such a downer, and hopefully I'll have some news about my next project for you. Stay tuned.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Nepeta

I've been meaning to do some restaurant reviews ever since we moved to GP. Last night my wife and I, as well as our acquaintance Jon, tried out the Catmint Teahouse & Martini Bar, so I figure now is as good a time as any. So here goes.

The Food
Seeing as how we are all uncultured slobs, and didn't recognise many of the items on the menu, we just orderd a dinner for three and hoped for the best.
Egg and Tomato soup - A nice flavour, but I don't like tomatos and the mushy shredded egg threw me off.
Dutch Beans - Actually snow peas. Not sure if that was just some engrish on the menu or if dutch beans is an actual alternate name for snow peas. Anyways, they were really tasty and had a really nice savoury garlic flavour.
Chicken and Shelled Shrimp Chow Mein - There was chicken and shrimp in this? Other than the tiny amount of meat, it was really tasty. I'm a big fan of chow mein in general though.
Brazed Pork in Sweet Sauce - Usually I hate sweet food (sweet is for candy, not meals) but I actually quite enjoyed this. The sauce was more smokey than sweet in my opinion, so that may be why. The meat itself was not the highest quality, with a fair bit of fat and gristle.
Steamed Jazmine Rice - What it says on the label.
(Food Rating - 3.5 out of 5)

The Drinks
I didn't get a chance to try the tea, so I'll have to try and remember to blog about it the next time. We sampled about 10 different kinds of martinis, which is probably why I don't recall all of the names of them. I don't really enjoy classic martinis, though I can understand how one could aquire a taste for them. A few of the variations I could see myself trying again, but a lot of them just weren't that memorable.
(Drink Rating - 2.5 out of 5)

The Service
Could have been better, speed wise, but they were friendly and very helpful in suggesting food and drink items for us to try.
(Service Rating - 3 out of 5)

The Environment
The decor was nice, a combination modern style (lots of frosted glass) and the usual knicknacks you usually see in chinese restaurants. It was rather quiet while we were there (keeping in mind we were there from 8:00 - 10:30 on a sunday night), and we only saw I think 7 other patrons. They chose to use modern hits for background music, which I could have done without but I'm sure a lot of other people would enjoy (I'm just not a huge fan of Soulja Boy Tell'em while I partake in fine food). I did notice a bit of a cold draught, but were seated next to the door, and it's always windy in GP.
(Environment Rating - 3.5 out of 5)

I really enjoyed myself, the food was good, and next time I'll be trying the tea. That being said, I do recommend you try out Catmint Teahouse & Martini Bar, but bring a little extra cash if you want to sample the martinis: they range from $4.95 to $12.00. If you know your way around Grande Prairie, Catmint is right next to KFC on 100th. If you don't know GP, find someone who does.
(Overall rating - 3.25 out of 5)

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Blog Posts for Bored Bloggers

I'm trying to stop using my twitter for stupid banal crap. Because really, who gives a shit what I had for dinner? Unless it was really good, I guess. That's probably as noteworthy as anything else I would write about.

I've recently started reading two new comics. Pictures for Sad Children is by John Campell and is one of those ones that isn't neccesarily intended to be funny (or it is intended to be funny, in which case maybe it just fails miserably.) Ellerbisms is by Marc Ellerby and is pretty much what I would want my webcomic to be like if I ever start up again. I can't recall how I was introduced to these strips, but they are good and you should give them a spin.


I had a bunch more stuff written down here, but then blogger decided to be a big DB, and I had to until the next day to actually publish. In that time I decided what I had written here wasn't so great, so I'l just leave it for another day.

P.S. I had chinese food for lunch.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

What the hell is a 'Chuzzle' anyway?

Need to waste a few minutes? Go play Chuzzle. It's similar to games like Bejewelled but like 100X more fun and challenging.

Some videos to share with you tonight.

This first one gets good at about the 1:00 mark, so just skip or put up with the first bit.
Does anyone else...? I mean, is it wrong that I...? Uh. Nevermind.



This second video is not recommended for those who are afeard of clowns.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Traveling Love

I looked at Adam Sandler's Twitter feed. It was just a bunch of shitty quotes from his own movies. If it is infact Mr. Sandler updating it, or even if it's just his representation, it's pretty pathetic.

I've jumped on the humourous anagram bandwagon. I couldn't find a good one for Fragile Tranquility (damned 'Q'), but Roundabout Expressway gave me a wikkid idea for a new alter ego: Suey Pawn, Sex Troubador.

It's been almost an hour since I wrote that last paragraph. I just learned that Bea Arthur died. Then I started reading about Gladiators for some reason. Weird.

Gah! Got distracted again by B3ta. And perogies. Delicious, delicious perogies. Mmm.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Beefy pt. 2: The Update

As I mentioned in the last post, I'd combined the remains of the pepto candle and the rest of the blue stuff. Here it is, all melty like.
014

Here it is in the energy drink can mold, and immediately after being removed.

015016

Looks pretty good, right? Well, on closer inspection, it appears that someone ate a bunch of pink and blue cotton candy, then threw it up in a can. Once again, the dye didn't melt. Most of it settled to the bottom, and what remained speckled the candle rather garishly. I also managed to slice my fingers all to hell when I removed it from the can. It burned fine though. But as you can probably see, I need to work on centering my wicks.
017018

I decided to pour another candle in this method, only without any additives. I wanted to see if it would sputter less, or stink like burning fat. Turns out it burns the same, and doesn't smell like anything at all. I also didn't cut myself this time. I think that may be because the can was slightly wet when I poured the tallow, and the tiny ammount of water that coated the can assisted in the removal.
019020

So endeth the Beef Tallow Candle Adventure. I might try a few more, and maybe even go buy some beeswax (though it is hella expensive) just to try it out. I'm not sure what I'll do with the rest of my fat (I only used up about 1/4 of what I rendered). Maybe try and make soap, if I can get ahold of some lye. I've got some other stuff I want to try first, though, so I may just freeze it and leave that for another day.

Be sure to check out the first part of this adventure. If anyone has any questions, or would like to share their own candle making stories, feel free to comment.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Beefy

Anyone who knows me knows that when I say I'm gonna do something, it's gonna get done. A few weeks ago, while wondering what to do with some excess hamburger grease, I decided I wanted to learn how to make beef tallow candles. I ended up having to get fat scraps from a local butcher shop because we don't cook enough beef, it turns out.

Because I didn't think I'd be blogging about it, I forgot to get pictures of the fat rendering process. There are a few different methods, I went with the 'chop-it-up-and-fry-it-then-drain-it' method. I then boiled the liquid fat to purify it. After refrigeration, this is what the final product looked like.
001

Nice, creamy white tallow! I ended up with about 8 pieces like this, some a little larger.

Using a pouring pot (you can get these at any craft store in the candle-making section) in the double-boiler style, I began to melt the tallow. If one was adding fragrance or dye, the second photo would be the time to do that. I declined to do so with this batch.
002003

I had also purchased a candle mold (also available at any craft store). This is what the prepared mold looks like. I won't go into much detail here because they come with instructions, and in the end I didn't use this mold anyways.
004

As I was all by my oneseys while doing this, it would have been difficult/dangerous for me to try and get photos of the pouring of the tallow. Here is the filled mold, and again after cooling some.
005006

This is where things went wrong. This mold is designed for use with wax (beeswax, paraffin, soy, etc.) There are significant differences between wax and tallow. Even after cooling for hours, the candles refused to leave the mold. After 3 attempts I got frustrated and I may have sworn a little bit. Maybe. Anyways, I decided to try something different, and used the bottom of a paper milk carton as a mold instead. I also figured that since I was no longer using a traditional method, I'd throw in some colour (red) and scent (apple blossom). Because I was pissed off I once again forgot to get pictures.

Here is the candle after being removed from the mold. It turned out pink, as you can see. Like, pepto bismol pink. Even though I used (what I thought) was extra dye. I made another mistake here, by putting the mold in the freezer. As soon as I removed the candle it cracked in half. I decided to just go for it anyways.
007

Since Crystal was home now, I enlisted her help in lighting the candle while I got photos. She burned herself with the lighter, flinched, and brought her hand directly down on the candle...
008009

After some more cussing, we decided to light it anyway. This was one of the few things that worked out. Despite a little bit of sputtering, the flame burned clean. There was none of the black smoke our foul stench I had been warned about. After burning for a while, another crack formed and a lot of the tallow spilled out, so I decided to extinguish the flame before things got too messy.
010011012

Immediately after I was sure the candle would work, I poured another one. This time I used blue dye and rain forest fragrance. It turned out a pastel blue colour, even though I used even more dye than in the previous candle, and it had a bit of a speckled appearance. I think the problem may have been that I didn't allow the dye to melt thoroughly enough before pouring. You can see this candle in action at my daily photo blog.
013

For my next attempt, I combined the remains of the pink candle and the rest of the blue wax (and even more dye). Since I wrecked my paper mold removing the blue candle, I had to find a new mold. I decided to go for an energy drink can, though removing the candle may be a bit tricky this time. I'll update soon.

Read the rest of this story here.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Sunday, April 5, 2009

And so the blogger fell in love with himself.

I watched Twilight today.

It was really, really, bad. Just. Oh. So bad. Like. Well, this is more of a description of the novel than the film, but other than the horrible acting and bad special effects, it is pretty much Twilight In A Nutshell.

The acting was, indeed horrible. Kristen Stewart (as Bella Swan, a gag inducingly gothic romance inspired name) occaisionally attempts to make her "acting" seem natural by stuttering, but really it's just forced and stupid. She actually seemed to show some talent in Into The Wild (2007), so this was really just a big dissappointment on her part. Robert Pattinson, I just refer to as Edward Cullen all the time now (as in "Oh look, Edward Cullen played Cedric Diggory") because really, who the f*ck is Robert Pattinson? Anyways, Edward Cullen can't act either. Supposedly he didn't have a dialect coach to help him speak with an american accent, so maybe thats why most of the time he sounds like he's got a mouth full of marbles.

The rest of the acting was equally crappy and unmemorable. All of the other vampires just reminded me of that other abomination Queen of The Damned. What a pile of crap that was. But that's another post.

I can understand the appeal of the books and the film among 15 year old girls, because it is extremely juvenile. And girly. I just don't get how women in their 20s are falling in love with a character from a novel (who, by the way, is rather ugly in the film. I do a pretty good impression, though. I call it my 'Edward Cullen.' Brow furrowed, lips slightly parted, head tilted foreward. No real facial expression or animation. Oh yeah, thats how I gets the ladies.)

Crystal is attempting to read the series and continues to fall asleep. I got about 80 pages in before I gave up in disgust.

Watch the film if you must. Read the book, it's probably better for your brain. But be warned. Both suck. So very bad.

(My Rating of both the novel and the film - 0.5 out of 5)

Friday, April 3, 2009

Quickie

I enjoy this song. I heard it last night on CBC radio. It's by Canadians. Please, won't you have a listen?

Fool's Gold Rope - The Violet Archers

That is all.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Oh My Frick.

I have, at last, submitted to the will of Trend. Oh my frick, I got twitter. Just like every other arsehole what has Internet. You can see it there on the right, in the sidebar. I've decided now that I'm supposed to 'tweet' (what a stupid pretentious phrase) every day, I should make more of an effort to update the ol' blog (also a stupid pretentious phrase, when you think about it). So here I am, with an update!

My wife and I have moved to a new place. Come to think of it, I don't think I ever mentioned we moved to a new town last summer. Come to think of it, I don't know if I ever mentioned we got married. Anyways, rent and bills are huge now, and we have a lot of empty space. But it's our empty space, and they're our bills. It feels good to be on our own finally as a married couple. With, of course, our dog Max. Wait, did I ever mention we had a dog?

What's new, what's new, what's new... I'm sure I've seen a dozen or so movies that I could review since the last time I posted. Really, I haven't seen anything recently enough for it to still be fresh in my mind, so we'll leave that for another day. I will mention one movie: Watchmen. Go see it. If you've read the comic book, if you haven't read it, if you hate superheroes, if you love them, go see it. I personally don't think it strayed that far from the comic book, (especially not compared to X-Men and the like) though others would disagree fiercely. Be warned, though, there's a bit of violence. Okay, a lot of violence.

Other than moving (and making a short trip home for a funeral) I've just been up to the usual. Readin' webcomics and takin' pictures (which, by the way, you should go look at on my other blog). Also, I've been engrossed with WhatIfSports.com, a fantasy league site with a twist. You can make a team of pretty much any athlete who ever played in a professional league (NHL, MLB, NBA, or NHL) and pit them against other player's similarly composed teams. You can have a whole team of Gretzkys if you want (and if your salary cap will allow it). Since the only sport I like is hockey, I usually just play the NHL. Since I suck at building a winning team, I usually just build teams of thugs and see how many penalties I can rack up. Anything less than 100 penalty minutes and 3 ejections per game, I consider a loss. You can try for free, and its not too expensive if you decide to buy a season.

So did you notice that up there I referred to Watchmen as a 'comic book'? What are you gonna do about it, huh? Even Allan Moore calls it a comic book. Of course, he is a crazy hippy and also refuses to see the film, but there I go arguing with myself again. 'Graphic novel' is a phrase that was created so grown men don't feel embarrassed about buying comic books. I'm never embarrassed that I bought a comic book. In fact, when I bought my copy of Watchmen I also bought some Lego. I bought a front-end loader, and I built it the next afternoon. I wanted the sweet bulldozer, but it was like 50 bucks. Anyways, what the hell was I just talking about?

Have you ever noticed that people show more sympathy for animals than they do humans? Whats that all about? I bet those animal cruelty charities make more money than World Vision. Not that I'm innocent. I cried in theater when I saw I Am Legend and Will Smith had to kill his dog*. I pretty much refuse to see Marley & Me because I know the dog dies, and I don't want to cry about it. I once found the remains of a kitten who'd been run over, picked it up, and walked it all the way to the nearest park so it could have some dignity and it's final repose among the trees, instead of on the pavement. My own dog was found on the side of the road in the middle of the night. I'd never do that for a person. Just an observation.

* Wanted to make this point, but didn't want to digress from the one I was making. Wasn't Omega Man so much better than I Am Legend? Nah, just kidding. I may not have liked the ending very much, but the opening scenes of Legend definitely made you feel alone. Omega Man did have Charlton Heston though...

Anyways, this post is way too long as it is, so I leave you with this video of Jimmy Stewart reading a poem about his dog Bo, which of course made me cry.



P.S. Happy April Fools!!!

Friday, March 13, 2009

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Dear GP Skank

Yes, you, the one who looks they are wearing a cheap halloween wig that someone dipped in javex. Bleached blonde really doesn't look good on anyone, except maybe women who are already blonde. You aren't fooling anyone, your black eyebrows give you away. Also, it appears that you have styled your hair with an egg-beater.
That piercing in your face looks retarded, take it out. Why don't you get your face tattooed? Oh, because you realize it looks stupid and wouldn't want to leave it there for the rest of your life. You just like to look stupid temporarily, I see.
Showing me your cleavage won't get you anywhere. I'm not going to give you special treatment just because you leaned foreward. All you're doing is giving me a free show. Since your boobs are either fake, or you have a really expensive push-up bra, it's not really that great of a show anyways.
Your rig pig boyfriend, who most likely bought you those breasts, is a douchebag. No doubt he wears Tapout and Fox, and watches UFC religiously. You probably feel like the Queen of GP, riding around in the passenger seat of his pickup, the one with the quad in the box and the 14-inch lift. Really, all of us hate you and just think you're douchebags. Well, except for maybe other douchebags.
By the way, don't feel bad that you cheated on this man, the one who bought your boobs, while he was away at camp. Right now he's probably so coked out he forgot the hooker's name.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Saturday, February 7, 2009

What hath Joel wrought?

Tom Waits uses twitter? That settles it, I'm signing up.

Christian Bale? Yes, he went overboard. But I have a temper, a pretty bad one at that, so I know what he was going through here. Sometimes you get so mad, and even after your brain has said 'whoa, hey buddy, time to shut up' your mouth just won't stop. You're still cool in my books, Batman. Also, it makes for a catchy tune (warning, super sweary)

Ok, so I've linked to some pretty questionable stuff in the past. This video crushes all of it. I'm 100% serious, if you are easily offended, or grossed out, or even just a normal person, DO NOT WATCH THIS. I cringe even as I link. Ladies and gentlemen, Joel Veitch's Wanky Shit Demon. God help me.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Figured I better post something since we're already 11 days into the new year. Not much going on here, so take a look at all these nice photos.

2008 in Photos pt. 1
2008 in Photos pt. 2
2008 in Photos pt. 3

As well as 15 nature photographers you should know about.